BPR ID (no you da ho) Operating Instructions
- Mission: The mission of this chapter is to promote MTB riding, (racing may fall into that catagory) comaradery, helping out those in need on the trail, with a strong emphasis on having fun. So don’t be a dick.
- Vision : BPR Idaho (no you da ho) vision is pretty simple, ride bikes, have fun, ridicule those who are taking shit too seriously, push limits and if there are adult beverages in this mix…. all the better
- Bikes: BPR Idaho (no you da ho) does not discriminate. (Unless your on a e-bike, then your a dick) Single Speed and rigid will garner you the most street cred….. but gears are sometimes needed (we realize that not everyone is willing to or able to commit to this lifestyle) so “cheater” bikes will not be excluded, (also known as being Idaho nice)… on a case by case basis…but you will lose street cred… to be clarified later.
- Booze: Yes please! As chapter leader (El Jefe) of the Idaho (no you da ho) chapter I prefer bribes of the hard cider variety. That said we do not discriminate (also known as being Idaho nice) to those who are alcohol intolerant. but you will be ridiculed and it does not exclude you from offering frequent refreshments to El Jef
- Uniform: Loose and baggy are the recommended garb for BPR Idaho (no you da ho). If you were to show up in form fitting garb expect to be ridiculed…. relentlessly…… until a time it is felt you have done your time for such a blatant disregard of the BPR way…. Exception is if worn to ridicule those taking shit too seriously…. thats cool!
- Attitude: Expectation of BPR Idaho (no you da ho) is to be courteous (also known as Idaho nice), offer assistance trailside and not bring any undue negative exposure within the MTB scene. Basically dont be a dick.
- Membership: Membership into BPR Idaho (no you da ho) requires a trial/probational period to be determined by the chapter leader… this could be a day, month, year, decade… or forever. This is at the ultimate discretion of the chapter leader. Along the same path, membership can be revoked with loss of too much street cred… (yes there are standards that must be met) going full roadie or being a dick will be grounds for loss of membership or trial membership…. so you have been warned.
- There is a fast track option however that is up to the chapter leader to determine. (Best if your on good terms with the chapter leader… and bribe with the appropriate adult beverage )
- Expectations on rides: You are a freaking adult.. helmet, water (or beverage of choice), tools, food are your responsibility, if you forget something I will help you but you will be catching some shit for it… If I forget something it is expected that members/probies will supply said required supplies without question or complaint. Once again, dont be a dick.
- Growth… or not: As Idaho (no you da ho) grows or doesn’t… any changes can and will be made by the chapter leader. Insight and advice is requested and welcomed from BPR members… probies, will take your input with a grain of salt… unless you lead it with a good cider… Nuff said.
- CYA: I may or may not be CPR certified, good samaritan laws will not apply while I’m on the trail with you. Typically I will try and help you anytime I am able. Unless your a dick, then your on your own..
The Leader: Fatty McGhee
Letter of Intent
Reasons to consider …….
- Accept or not, wont ruin my life….
- I won’t drink ANY of your beer, (Repeat after me, I HAD A BAD EXPERIENCE) I will likely even bring some local brew for the crew when we meet which means more beer for you.
- 3While I wont drink your beer I will fuck up some cider if it’s in your cooler and offerred.
- Same goes for brandy
- And whiskey
- Been told I live in my own alterered reality (alternate reality) so it seems a natural fit
- SS and rigid is my preferred method of riding, no squish machines in the stable…
- I roll a JoneSS Plus steel ride (baller on a budget) but dream of Sheep…..
- Will always spread the good word and uphold the reality as I see appropriate.
Thank you for your consideration….. or not..
Gnarly is a klunker dude. Gnarly builds klunders, Gnarly modifies klunkers and Gnarly races klunkers. And when the dude isn’t racing klunkers, he’s racing cars / trucks… like that Baja s*^t. Yeah, Gnarly is kinda like Hayduke. He’s a racer. But we’re pretty sure that he’d rather drink beer and talk about racing… then race. Or maybe we’ve just corrupted his racing soul. Or not.
Letter of Intent
I just want to ride with my IdaBros. And if joining the Back of the Pack allows me to ride even more with my IdaBros, so be it. I could go on ranting and raving about the cycling heaven that ensues once we are together, but I won’t because it would be a lie.
I will however and somewhat gladly and not forced in any way, follow Fatty as the leader of Idaho Back of the Pack Racing. But by all means this doesn’t imply that I won’t call him names and or push him of an edge and or throw a stick at his wheels when he gets on my nerves and or simply for shits and giggles.
What I promise to bring to the group: Chaos, mischief, drama, mayhem, disorder, low blows, pranks etc etc and or other sophisticated, civilized and educated behavior for the betterment of the club.
I won’t drink alcohol. But I will surely get chocolate wasted. If anyone has a problem with that, they can go suck an egg.
So there, my cards are on the table, read them and weep. Take it or leave it.
Letter of Intent
Dear Mr. Fatty McGhee,
This is my letter of intent to join the Idaho chapter of Back of the Pack Racing Team (BPR). I think I’m a perfect candidate because I like riding bikes and drinking beer.
Honestly I’m not really good at either, I once fucked my shoulder up drunk riding an eBike. I’m an ok guy, I’ve never joined al qaeda or the aryan nation nor do I sympathise with them.
Myke Ramsey aka Gritty the Puerto Rican