New Zealand: The Wrap Up

The New Zealand Wrap Up – That’s Right.

This blog posting is not for you, the Back of the Pack fan that can only pay attention to the first 5 paragraphs or the first 5 minutes of info or whichever 5 minutes comes first. (Confused by that comment – I bet you are.)

Anyway, this Wrap Up is for The Madre and my nieces. It’s a short geography lesson with a few  tips for yankee travelers that find themselves in New Zealand. So, I’ll keep the dialog short.

AND if I was you – just turn off the computer and go to bed. I’ll get some good stuff up on this blog in about two weeks. I promise.

Yes, The Wrap Up:

Term of the trip – Luddite:

Just because…. because the Lt Col is a practicing Luddite (in public) and The Judd wants to be a Luddite. We should all be Luddite’s. Because, it’d  be cool.

The Common Question, Is it Lunacy or Ludacracy?:
Lunacy – paddock racing, sawtooth race profiles, bungy jumping. 
Ludacracy – everything at the Back of the Pack that seems logical or could be logical if the conditions are right. BTW – ‘logic’ is defined by the B.P.R. Founding Fathers, because logic is a bit twisted at the back of the Back of the Pack.
When in New Zealand:
  1. The question is not ‘Are you gonna bungy jump’ the question is ‘big or small? Nevis or Kawarua?’
  2. Jet boating to lunch – it’s really the only way to get to lunch.
  3. Rally car driving at night – what else would you do? Watch CSI New Zealand? Doubt it.
  4. Target practice before dinner – because there is always an ‘after dinner’…
  5. Rabbit hunting after dinner – because you had target practice before dinner…
The Commonly Asked Questions – From the Americans:
  1. Are the majority of Kiwis born and raised in NZ?
  2. Do the majority of Kiwis have jobs or do the just ‘play’ all day / everyday?
  3. Do the majority of Kiwis take jet boats to lunch?
  4. Do Kiwis eat anything other than Lamb?
  5. Can you tell the difference between a Kiwi accent & an Aussie accent.
  6. How to Kiwis describe the American accent? What about The Judd accent.
  7. If there are many black sheep in NZ how come there are only a few ‘Black Sheep’ in New Zealand.
  8. Is Vegemite a decent substitute for Green Chile Cheeseburgers?
The Vegemite Sandwich:

Buying bread from a man in Brussels
He was six foot four and full of muscles
I said, “Do you speak-a my language?”
He just smiled and gave me a vegemite sandwich

And to take you back to the days when you were breakdancing and riding unicycles… oh that was me in 1982. (Ok you Men at Work freaks – I know it was 1st recorded in 1981 – so go easy.)
Men at Work – he just smiled and gave me a vegemite sandwich

Unique Opportunities for Shopping:

  1. JetStar, An Airline that will charge you extra baggage fees, just because. Remove those fees, just because. And recharge those fees, just because. Jerks.
  2. An Airline that will throw Foxy Mamas off the plane… in a moments notice… just for being a B-I-T-C-H.
Morale of the story…
don’t fly JetStar if a) you are checking bags, b) if you are a Foxy Mama B-I-T-C-H.
The Random Stuff:

  • Non English speaking individuals are not afraid to talk on the cell phone while on the Thomas P. Crapper. (Note1: Thomas P didn’t invent the crapper – but worked to make it popular. Note2: Americans don’t answer the phone – ever, just because.)
  • Old habits are hard to break. I kept looking for a NZ beer bottle opener – just to remember that Dan, The BPR Crew Chief, taught me the secret to removing a beer cap without a Yankee tool. 
  • I’ll never figure out if I should tip 20% on service, food, booze. Seems like ‘local’ establishments don’t expect a tip but ‘tourist’ establishments do. Makes sense though – scam the Damn Yankee. 
The Next Trip:

  1. If Henry asks ‘The big jump or the small jump’, the answer will be ‘big jump, obviously’.
  2. I should’ve bought those plaid shoes. Yeah the plaid shoes at the shop where Dan, The Crew Chief, was eyeing the alligator ankle boots.
And full disclosure. The TeddNeck is one step behind Dan. He sports the leather ankle boots – just not alligator leather.

The HACS, The FastBack:

The HACS and the FastBack make for an easy packing job. 


BLACK SHEEP HACS & FastBack – decoupled dude

Just A SLIDESHOW – just like you’re sitting in my living room:

Want to hang in my living room? Just bring some Modus Hoperandi

just some pics and tunes – New Zealand 2011

The Adventures – A Visualization:

Where did I start? Where did I end up?  

The South Island Adventures – Back of the Pack Style

I started on ‘The Ice’, after I arrived on ‘The Ice’

a boring New Zealand sunset after 21 days without darkness

just a bit of a freefall

Arrowtown to Macetown

the 1st ride with Dan and Henry


The West Side… of Lake Wanaka

the 2nd ride with Dan and friends

Lake Wanaka from the west
cold and wet water… a river
water water everywhere

water, hills and mountains

Jet Boating to Lunch

just a picnic – Back of the Pack style

water and mountains

different water and different mountains

more of the same, not really
The Cruise to Christchurch

a short 5 hour cruise…
BPR Southern Headquarters to BPR Northern Headquarters
sort of like ‘safe houses’ across New Zealand

The Le Petite Brevet:

I’m not a redundant dude – so I won’t be redundant. 

Check out this link for a review of the Le Petite Brevet
Below is the route. Just because it’s cool.

Final Thoughts:

When I’m hungry – I think about what’s gonna be on Dan’s table in a day or two.

lamb, of course

beef, at times

venison, 5 or 6 times a week
and one final pic:
The dudes in NZ

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